Monday, 9 December 2013


Somehow I still haven't gotten over my fear of cities... 
Sometimes I try really hard, and other times I just don't try at all. I really can't wait for that day when I can pack up my car, move my lifes possessions back down South to the pokey little corner of England that time forgot. It's not as if I don't want great things; I can't wait to travel the world, explore, hike up mountains, ski, skydive, snorkel in the great barrier reef and stand beneath an enormous Redwood! I can't wait for all of those things! There's just something terribly wrong about being trapped between buildings and buildings and more and more buildings. It might not even be that, its living so far away from the Sea. I can't sleep here because of the city lights in my window, I can't hear owls hooting anymore. I miss just listening to nightbirds and rain drops when I fall asleep, not cars. The only light that should be filling up my room is the silvery moon and stars, not orange street lamps and light pollution. 

So the other week, lovely George came up to see me and we wasted no time in getting out and about and enjoying the last few weeks that Autumn had left in it, and in my desperate bid for some open space, we used my 'ever-so-useful' free National Trust pass (Because I work at one of their properties ^.^) to go explore the Prior Park Property in central Bath.
It was a gloriously sunny Autumn Morning, and was possibly one of the best days in October :)  

There is something really adorable and funny about swan/duck bottoms. This particular swan had no interest in making friends, and after realising that by biting George repeatedly, we wouldn't give him any food, he gave us one hell'uva pose for the camera :P 

At the heart of the Park, there's a rather beautiful elderly Palladian Bridge. Even though the autumn colours really can't be beaten by any other time of year, I really can't wait for summer to roll around again so I can come back here for Picnics :D  

                                                                A view of the city skyline

George's look of derisive disgust as I attempt a lens flare selfie :P 

George thinks Im a pumpkinhead

Working for the National Trust definitely has its advantages! 
I really love Prior Park and can't wait to come back here in the summer for Picnics galore!! 
Alas.. it was pretty cold, so instead of a picnic we headed to Bea's Vintage Tea Rooms in Bath for some yum yums :) 

I really wanted to take home the lovely Crockery :) Im a sucker for the mis-matched higgledy-piggledy

George was explaining to me the use of a tea strainer.. a bit embarrassing, but yes, I am a poor girl from a humble country family and I've never had to use a tea strainer before >.< When all these little leaves were floating about in my tea cup, I was a tad confused :P luckily, one of us is cultured in the find art of tea-drinking but wasn't very amused that his girlfriend is an embarrassment, the words "Can't take you anywhere" were definitely mumbled.

Showing me how its done... proper job 

                                                                 mmm cake :) 

I also ate my first scone (rhymes with cone)  without complaining :P I deviated from both the Cornish and Devonshire method and boycotted Jam completely because Jam sucks :p 

All in all, A lovely time was had all round and much beautiful 1930's music was enjoyed. 
Me and George still plan to open a funky tea room one day and take up Lindy Hop classes, and plans to educate me in the correct methods of making a decent coffee or tea :P. Everyone lived happily ever after in the fairy kingdom of Bath, and Autumn became Winter..
and Im now so very very cold ^.^ 

Saturday, 30 November 2013

Banjo's & Foggy Fields - A session with Abbie Irwin

This is one of my favourite musician collaborations to date. Abbie is so much fun, a real ball of energy and I didn't realise how much fun it could be working in the foggy gloom.
I'll definitely be using this beautiful dreariness again for more photographs as it really gives a bleak wintery atmosphere that I'm quite fond of. A quietness. A peace 

Thursday, 14 November 2013

How Anxieties leak into our Dreams

It's always the same place; A leafy forest that bathes itself in the late afternoon glow of an infinite autumn. 
For a second there, I feel completely alone. I can't even hear bird song, the rustling of wind in the leaves or a crunch of twigs under the foot of a fallow deer. It's almost as if I'm the last human on Earth, and everything has ended. This forest is all that's left, with only me in it. 

After a while I begin to realise, I'm not alone. How silly of me; I'm seldom alone. It rarely leaves me any more, I try so hard to lose it. To run away. To hide. It always finds me. every single time.

It's a presence... always lurking in the background. guarding me from the rest of the world. Attacking anyone that comes near me, keeping me all to itself. Is that why I'm the only person left? 

It's ok. Its not so bad here... I have everything I need to get by. Sometimes it's even nice, the loneliness. 

Often, I even go looking for it, like a masochist. I've grown so used to it's company, that I beg for its return when it's gone. I watch it curiously, not sure If I truly understand it, nor it me. Sometimes we watch each other like a silent elderly married pair, that have nothing left to say to each other.

Sometimes we walk side by side

and sometimes.... it gets me. 

walking with anxiety,
A short Photo story
by Sarah Porteus

Model: Keren Margetts


Sunday, 3 November 2013

Sleep Walker

Wide open spaces. A void. Foreverness. 
I love beaches, be it a small cornish cove, or a bleak and enormous stretch of sand and windy dunes. Living in a city, even one as small as Bath gets really claustraphobic, and sometimes for no reason at all you need to drive 40 miles to the nearest bit of coast and violently assault your senses with harsh wind, salty air and an infinity of steely grey spread out before you, inviting you, taunting you. 
I've grown up on the sea, its my life. I know that sounds like a cliché statement, but living by the sea really does affect you in some way (Or it does for me at least). I think mentally I dry out; I need water the same way a plant needs sun light. My happiest state on earth, is floating; floating on the waves with my eyes closed with a salty breeze on my face with the cool water swilling about my fingers and toes. I don't care about cold water, I don't care if its the evening and the suns going down. I love having a beach to myself, and feeling like I'm the last person on earth. I love feeling as though the sea is a friend, a foe and family. Its a friend, because it is always there for me, a foe because it challenges me and sometimes frightens me, but family because I've grown up with it a part of me. I cannot survive without it. I can't even describe its importance, words don't always fail me but to describe the sea they do. 
Often, if not every night I dream about the sea. I dream that I should swim to a desert island, and live there forever eating coconuts (Which actually taste edible in my dreams :p) Sometimes I dream I live in a small wooden shack on an enormous grey lonely beach on the Scottish islands, and I have each and every day to myself to just stare at it and never spare a thought for society and its regimented monotony. 
One day, I'll return to my home county and I'll be comfy and I'll be happy. I'll spend my evenings sitting wrapped in a blanket curled up in the dunes watching the stars come out, or skimming the waves with my fingers on my surf board, or discovering little sea critters and shells whilst snorkeling on the rocky coves around south Cornwall. One of my favourite things to do, is to swim upside down, so Im looking upwards at the surface of the water, and I can see the sparkles of sunlight dancing. Sometimes I lift my fingers out to touch the air, and its the most remarkable feeling. I've rambled too much, but today I feel sentimental; no matter how many cups of water I drink, I still feel as though I'm drying up. 

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